Gabrielle - Out of reach
So much hurt, so much pain
Takes a while to regain
What is lost inside
And I hope that in time
You’ll be out of my mind
I’ll be over you
A poster I stumbled upon while walking downtown a couple of months ago.
Seriously, who says they would like to talk to you then look for someone else?
WHAT IS THIS FUCKERY?
Fucking tears. Go back where you came from.
I’ve been having these dreams for the past weeks. They’re all related to me going home or me going out with my friends. Basta something that reminds me of home. So anyway, I always end in this scene where we’re all laughing or something exciting is about to happen. Then I wake up. I see the tree outside the window. I see my Winnie the Pooh comforter, and I always realize that it was all a dream. Of course. How could it all come true anyway. I’m stuck here, and I’ve no where to go. Even my dreams hinder me from being happy and going back home. I just really can’t take it anymore here. I’m not exaggerating when I say that the life here is just not the life meant for me. I just can’t keep up with the people here. I feel so useless and worthless and I just can’t do anything to be better. People always complain about them being no one, and being bored, and not being able to do anything, and not having a future. Well look at me. I’m not kidding when I say that my future is basically fucked. I’m sorry if I’m being overly dramatic, and if I’m not being thankful for all of my blessings, being with my family, eating properly, having a roof under my head and the rest of that shit. I’m really sorry. I’m sorry if I’m being insensitive to the rest if those in the 3rd world. I just can’t keep pretending to myself that I’m okay. It’s driving me crazy. I also can’t keep reminding myself that I’m not alone, cause really, I am. I just don’t want to do anything about it anymore cause when I do something, let’s say complain or be a brat, it’s my parents that suffer. And I don’t want that anymore. They’ve been doing it for the past 9 years. I don’t wanna burden them anymore. I just want myself to accept the fate that’s given to me. I want something that’s clearly not meant for me.
